This is a tough thing to do, but I am pretty confident that I should do this. Sorry if you were looking forward to Hectic Hump Day. I'll get back to routine soon enough.
I hear all the time about how sad it is to put a dog down. I used to think that those people were just sensitive and needed to get a grip. I always thought that when a dog got put down, people should just dust their shoulders off and move on.
Well, I admit, I was totally wrong. Yeah, I said it, I was wrong. Today, Mom gave me the news that the difficult decision to put you down was made. I'm heartbroken. You've been my best buddy since 2000. I still remember the day you came into the house. You kind of stumbled in and said, "I'm here." Then proceeded to pee on something. We've been through crazy vet trips, your escapes to see the girl dog down the street, and you actually trying to join hands with the family when we prayed before my long drives back to college. You were very respectful, by the way. You had a huge penchant for potatoes, whether they be chips, fries, or just baked potato skins.
I miss you, little buddy. You were old, tired, and kind of cranky sometimes. However, you always came to listen to me when I talked about life. I'm sure you understood more than you let on, but you were a good ear. For a while, you were the only ear. By design, because I couldn't stand talking to people about my life. You were the best friend a guy could have. You were going to be the best man in my wedding. Although a lot of people were worried about you peeing on my future wife or biting a groomsman, you would have looked awesome in a tuxedo.
Conan, you were loved. You will be missed. I knew this day was coming, but I hate it. I'm sure you would have been a lot of help in my vote for president this November. You have a good eye for good and bad.
Love you little buddy.