The Fella

I'm sorry I haven't given you much recently. Life has been a roller coaster for me lately. Highs such as going on a mission trip to Cleveland, Ohio a week after LeBron returned; seeing one of my good friends accomplish something he's worked hard for for years; and getting a decent raise. Lows such as being turned down for a ton of jobs I'd interviewed for; having a friend have some troubles; and my Packers getting stomped.

This past Friday was both a high and a low.  You may or may not have been aware of a ton posts, tweets, and random musings about "The Fella." For those who may be unfamiliar, I worked part time for a company that provided support to folks with intellectual and/or physical disabilities. For two and a half years, my assignment was The Fella. This past Friday was my last day with him. He has started the next step in his life. He has moved out of his home and into a group home. This is the best thing for him. He needs to be free of his mother's home and try to do things on his own. I'm sure he'll succeed as long as the group home he's in cares for his success.

Over the course of my time with The Fella, I've learned a lot about myself. I've learned that life sometimes isn't about all boring things like bills, work, and serious things. Sometimes, a dude just needs a bag of chips and a soda. You have to learn to enjoy simple things in life like throwing rocks in a river. I mean we would literally spend hours sitting at a river chucking big rocks and skipping little rocks until one of us got thirsty. We'd play countless games of HORSE at a basketball court. Sometimes, it was just sitting down and watch Scooby Doo and Three Stooges when it got rainy outside. Just enjoying those simple things taught me that I don't need to take myself so seriously.

I also learned that even those little things are important to people. I can't count how many times I've had to deal with The Fella's temper when I beat him at UNO. When he'd stomp away after he got the final "E" in HORSE after trying to make that show two turns ago, it's just his way of expressing his frustration with both himself and the situation. I had a Youth Ministry professor at Liberty put it in perfect terms: "You can call it puppy love, but it's still real to the puppy." A stupid little game of UNO or basketball may not mean much to you, but to The Fella, it was everything. Sometimes in life, you have accept that people's loves are not your loves, and you shouldn't judge them for it.

Friday was our last evening together. It started when I took him to his favorite place to eat, Rancho Viejo. He saw his favorite waitress after she had her baby, so that made him happy. He ate what he always eats, cheese dip with hot sauce in it. He also stared at my black beans thinking they were raisins. We walked his dog, watched Three Stooges, and talked about his new life. When it was time for me to leave, he began to cry. That brought me to a few tears as well. I do get to hang out with him. I promised I'd take him places every so often and just have friend time. I probably won't see him for a couple of weeks just so he can get used to not having me around all the time.

Sometimes, I ask myself if I'm doing the right thing working two jobs. Outside of the financial gain, is it worth it? Well, after working with the Fella for as long as I have, I can say it is definitely worth it. His friendship has been invaluable. So, here's to you Fella. You've been great. You will succeed far better than your imagination. Just remember what you've learned about keeping your emotions in check and remembering that you don't hurt those you love. You're going to do great. Thank you for teaching me many life lessons.

America and Stuff

So it's been a while since I did one of these and figured today would be a good day to just vent. A lot of things are on my mind. I guess it's time to share them. I'll probably upset the masses, but what else is new?

It's America's birthday. It's a day where we celebrate the freedoms we were given by the sacrifices of those before us. Although I really can't claim much of the history because more of the people of my ilk were kind of forced over here. We helped in the effort, but I don't think we were as dedicated to the cause. Nevertheless, I'm thankful that I live in a country where I can spout my opinion and love my Lord with little to no repercussions.  I may get a concussion from an angry reader, but I'll chance it.

Speaking of America, what the heck is happening? There are so many issues that are just so pressing and crazy. Take for instance the case of the man who supposedly forgot his toddler was in his car for hours and died from heat exhaustion. There is no excuse. What makes it even worse was that the father was researching overheated car deaths weeks before this happened. What's even worse than that is his wife was researching as well. The young child had 2 insurance policies on him. It's frightening that there are children who have parents like this. However, we shouldn't be surprised. We live in a terribly selfish country.

Speaking of, that goes to my next rant. This whole Hobby Lobby thing. Basically, the Supreme Court says that Hobby Lobby has a right to not pay for every contraceptive. I don't understand why this is a big deal. Hobby Lobby didn't want to cover four abortifacient drugs. The "War on Women" pundits always talk about the government needing to stay out of the womb. Now that Hobby Lobby was given the right to refuse to pay for abortifacient drugs, these same pundits are now begging the government to intervene in their wombs. Most of the employees of Hobby Lobby aren't complaining. If this particular decision is truly that devastating, they'll leave. However, it seems that outside sources like to spend other people's money, so they'll just tell the employees to strike and fight back, you know how this goes. Oh, the money Hobby Lobby saves by not paying for those drugs can go towards the minimum of $14/hour they pay their full time employees and $9.50/hour for part time employees. Yeah, they're real jerks, aren't they?

I'm about to watch this hot dog eating contest. This cracks me up every year. A bunch of people eating ignorant amounts of pig parts and bread for 10 minutes. The world record is 69 in ten minutes. The dude said he could do 73 if it's a perfect day. Perfect day? His day will be littered with bathroom trips and Pepto Bismol. There's nothing perfect about that.

I'm pretty excited about an opportunity I have in a couple of weeks. I get to go to Cleveland, OH and do mission work. I'm not particularly sure what I'm doing, but I'm going there with an open mind and heart. I'm not going there with any expectations. I learned if you expect anything out of a mission trip, you'll be disappointed. If you go with nothing in mind, you'll be blessed. You can't force the Holy Spirit and God's will. You can only sit back and let them work. This will actually be my third trip to Cleveland. If any Ohio peeps are in the area, find me.

Apparently I missed the BET Awards. Black Evil Television isn't really my forte. Today's music is terrible. It's garbage with no end in sight. The shameful part is that there are people who think this is the best stuff ever. Terrifying that the people who think this will one day put me in a home when I'm too old to fight back.

God bless you all on this holiday. Remember to protect your dogs from the morons with firecrackers. Protect yourselves from the morons who don't know when enough booze is enough.

When Things Go Boom

You know, sometimes in life, things just go completely wrong. I was absolutely stunned today by some crazy events. It started with me heating some oil so that I can fry some chicken. I was using a different oil than I usually use per a Rocco Dispirito recipe. I like Rocco, he's a good cook.  Well, I've heard that anyway. Well, I'm in the kitchen bouncing from place to place when all of a sudden, I hear a huge pop and my pot's in flames on the stove. I tried to reach for the baking soda but the flames were already too high and couldn't get to it without burning my arm. I called 911 immediately, trying to get help. My upstairs neighbor was already knocking on people's doors, getting everyone out. Thank God that the Roanoke Fire Department Engine 1 got there within minutes of me calling them. To say I was frightened would be the understatement of the century. This was probably the first time I showed fear in a situation since my childhood.

I thank God that no one was hurt. I thank God that the damage was cosmetic. I'd take a picture, but honestly, I'm not up for reliving that right now. I thank God that I can sleep in my own bed tonight because it's not nearly as rough as the fireman thought it would be. I thank God that I still have a microwave, a toaster, a George Foreman grill, and my Keurig machine, so no hunger here.

I often wonder why bad things happen. However, I was quickly reminded of my pastor's words over the last month. When you're doing things right for God, the Devil is at his most sinister. I don't think he said it like that, but it fits. I serve in a lot of capacities at my church. We just had a great meeting about Easter Sunday and all the wonderful things we want to do for the community. I, involuntarily, became the point of contact for the children's activities portion of the meeting. I'm okay with it, but I've never been the administrative type. Just tell me what to do, I'll do it. So this is really outside of comfort zone. We came up with some awesome ideas, and today was going to be the day I did some research on prices of things, but this fire happened. I guess I was a little distracted. This fire, as crazy as this sounds, was exactly what I needed to know that I'm doing things the right way. Even when I've disappointed God, and I have, trust me, I still get the opportunity to serve Him. When I serve Him, the Devil fights back. He tries to keep me from doing things the right way and doing what I ought to be doing.

Some of you reading this may not believe that a good God would allow this to happen in the first place, and that's okay. Believe what you want, but I know my God. I know that God has a plan. I comforted my neighbor who was scared to death. My landlord was more than gracious to me. My other neighbor, who actually called me a sweetheart yesterday while I was walking with my laundry basket, was calmed down and had no damages. I know that God will use this in a remarkable way.

A good bit of you friends have been nothing but supportive of me, and I thank you so much. Your prayers kept my place in tact and still livable. The firemen did an outstanding job of keeping abreast of the situation and keeping my place in tact. Again, thank you to the Firemen of Engine 1 in Roanoke for their quick response and calming words.

I think some cookies are in their future, when I get my stove...

Free and Brave

I've noticed that there is a huge commotion over a law that has been passed in Arizona. If you're not familiar, basically the Arizona State Legislature passed a bill that would allow business owners to refuse services based on religious beliefs. I'm pretty sure that this law was made to give Christian business owners the right to deny Gays and Lesbians services to their establishments. As you can guess, there is a huge stink. People are shaking their fists at the state of Arizona, calling them bigoted and intolerant. Other groups are saluting the lawmakers for allowance of religious freedoms.

I always ask this question: Why are people so enthralled with getting something from people who clearly don't want anything to do with them? If you're one of those people who are being discriminated against, why go through all the trouble? If someone doesn't want to give you business, go somewhere else. Here's how it usually plays out: person goes to business; business says, "no"; person files huge lawsuit, spending hard earned money on lawyers who couldn't give two spits about your predicament because they just want your money; and you still didn't get the service you were looking for. Sounds kind of stupid to me. Instead of wasting all your time, money, and energy on silly things like lawsuits and picket signs, why not just go somewhere else.  Then when someone asks why you didn't go to the original, you can calmly say, "they weren't good enough."

Look, I understand that discrimination exists and isn't right. However, we can't be so in love with getting someone back that we forget that other people have rights, too.  No matter how archaic and medieval the beliefs are in your mind, it's still theirs. You don't have the right to try to ruin someone because they don't think like you do. Again, I know about discrimination.  I grew up in a town that thinks the Ku Klux Klan is just misunderstood and that Martin Luther King, Jr was just a troublemaker who didn't know how to leave well enough alone. I get it.  However, I will always believe in every person's right to whatever they choose.

People might ask me what God thinks about my stance. God believes that people should ultimately follow His will. What that will is, you have to let Him tell you. I do believe that God isn't going to go out of His way to make sure a gay couple can't marry in a garden because the owner has convictions. If the owner values money, it really won't matter who comes walking through the door. However, if the owner has convictions and beliefs, no amount of money is going to change his mind.

This happened in the 60s and 70s with black people. Except, of course, they were hosed down and had dogs released on them. If someone doesn't want my business, I leave. I go about my business and find a place that will take my money. No need to go fussing and complaining and spending my money on a lawsuit.  Just roll out.

American businesses have the freedom to choose who they serve. American people just need the bravery to accept it and move on.

And this is Arizona, you should be used to this by now, right Chuck D?

Comeback Blog

It's been a while since I posted a blog.  My bad on that. 

Today is my birthday.  I decided not to do too much for my birthday.  However, this could be one of the best birthdays I've had in a while. 

It actually started yesterday when I baked a bunch of cookies for my co-workers at school.  I said I would do it, so I did.  They were a hit, thank goodness.  I got some goodies from some co-workers.  It really made my day.  A lot of well wishes from people, as well as perplexed looks when I told them how old I was.  It was nice.

I had a nice time with my folks at church and the youth group.  I got my Burger King crown.  The folks went around and said one thing they liked about me.  It was special hearing those things.

 I know that my birthday is the day where I'm kind of a big deal, however it's just humbling to know that your life is regarded so highly by people you love and respect.

In general, I have to say that this was an awesome birthday.  Just knowing that people care so much about you is really encouraging.

As I'm thinking about this birthday, it's a chace to look back at last year.  A lot of things have happened to me.  I moved to my own place.  As sad as having no roommates is, it's good for me to live alone.

I've cut the cord.  I have dropped cable television from my life.  I now use the Roku box.  I basically pay for the Internet and subscriptions to Netflix and HuluPlus.  Cut about 50 bucks from my monthly budget.  That's a good thing.  I have about 50 Roku apps that range from sports to movies to classic TV shows. 

I recently witnessed the Ken Ham-Bill Nye debate.  Atheists will tell you that Nye won.  Christians will tell you that Ham won.  God won the battle.  His Word was shared to millions of people.  Even if the people didn't want to hear it, they got it.  I think that was Mr. Ham's mission.  As a Christian, I am proud of the testimony and witness that Ken Ham showed.  Christianity isn't about outdoing someone or proving someone right or wrong.  It's about sharing Christ's love.  One thing I saw in Ken Ham was God's love.  You can hate the things of God all you want, but God isn't one to show off, so have at it.

Apparently, George Zimmerman wants to do celebrity boxing.  One, when did he become a celebrity?  Two, if he wants to be a boxer, why didn't he just outbox Trayvon instead of shoot him?  I wish Jason "Mayhem" Miller was still doing Bully Beatdown.  George would get crushed. 

I want to keep this blog going, so I'll try to post one a week.  Just talking about life and what I go through.

Just Take A Minute

By now, I'm sure you all know the verdict that was just handed down.  I won't lie to you, I'm flabbergasted that the jury couldn't even get manslaughter out of it.  To be exonerated of all charges, I can guarantee you that George Zimmerman is luckiest man on earth.  I don't understand this, I'll be honest.  I've watched the case for the most part.  I've kept up with the evidence.  I've kept up with the phone calls, the animations, and the experts.

I'll start with the elephant in the room, was this racism?  Depends on what you're asking about.  If you're asking me if I think George Zimmerman's reaction to Trayvon Martin walking around in his neighborhood in the rain in a hoodie (a perfectly natural thing to do when it's cold and rainy), then yes, I think George Zimmerman was being a racial profiler and a bigot.  If you're asking me if I think the case and the verdict was racist, honestly no.  I think the jury went with what they got and came up with a verdict.  I don't really like to jump on the "that's racist" bandwagon unless the N-word or other terrible words are being used or if horrible crimes against black people are being committed.  I personally thought that Zimmerman was guilty because he became a vigilante.  I'd feel the same way if the races were reversed.  I'd feel the same if these were women or one person was a woman.  It doesn't matter.  I really believe that Zimmerman was looking for trouble that night.

I want to jump to what this means.  I feel like this means a lot.  First of all, Florida has a history of racially charged incidents and crimes.  This does nothing to put more faith in Florida as far as that goes.  Florida laws have been written, re-written, and translated in the hopes of stopping this.  However, loopholes seem to be more prevalent there than most places.  Second of all, I think this could lead to some really bad things.  With the uprising of social media, Internet, and instant information being transferred in seconds, this could really start a firestorm.  Remember how bad it got in Los Angeles after the Rodney King verdict announced?  There was no Facebook or Twitter to spread that word.  This could be bad for the state of Florida.  This could be terrible for Zimmerman.  I honestly think "Not Guilty" was the worst verdict for him considering how we're all vengeful people in some ways.  There are people out there that will attempt to end Zimmerman.  This is dangerous.

This also means that a lot of Gun Control supporters are going to be hitting this place hard.  I'm not a big gun person.  They just don't appeal to me.  However, I'll always support a person's right to have and own a gun if they are proven worthy and competent enough.  However, I do believe that Florida needs to revamp the "Stand Your Ground" law.  They really need to make it clear when someone can use their gun to defend themselves.  If I see someone unfamiliar, I'm not chasing them down to see what they're up to, whether I have a gun or not.  Seems like "Stand Your Ground" invites that attitude.  Someone needs to re-write that a little better.

The worst thing about this case is that a 17, would be 18, year old boy is no longer with us.  Parents have lost a son.  A senior in college lost his little brother.  An unfairly vilified young lady lost her best friend.  The world lost a young man to, in my opinion, a senseless act.  There is nothing that a "guilty" verdict would have done to change that.  I'm looking at my Facebook feed, and I'm seeing people seemingly happy or okay with this.  I don't think anyone can be okay with this.  At peace, maybe.  Understanding that there is a higher purpose in all this, absolutely.  But, just okay?  People have lost someone.  It's terrible.  There is no justice in that.

I look back to times in my life where things seemed completely unfair.  I've been brought to tears over some things.  However, I know that there is a better tomorrow.  The Martin family will heal.  It will probably take a very, very long time.  The Zimmerman family will heal.  It will probably take a very, very long time.  The best thing to do is rely on God.  God's provision will suffice.  I know Zimmerman got a lot of flack for saying that this is "God's plan."  I do have a hard time believing that God wanted Zimmerman to shoot an unarmed teenager going to his dad's house.  Just like I have a hard time believing that the people who murdered my dad were carrying out God's plan.  I do believe that God will stand with us through these terrible trials.  We just have to be patient and trusting.  We also have to be sensible.  I'm pretty sure most, if not all of you reading this aren't going to start a riot.  So the next best thing is to pray and hope that those in Florida who are hurt, crushed, humiliated, and unsure don't do anything rash.  I'm typing this as I see Black Panthers on the television screen.

Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding.  That's how I'm going to cope with this thing.  You do what you do.

No Offense...

I kind of laugh when I hear that phrase.  People say that to kind of soften the blow of their words when they know for certain it's not a good thing to say.  Seems like words are getting more and more offensive.  You can hardly say anything without a watchdog group or a special interest group sending protesters to your front door.  Every other phrase causes a boycott, petition, or rally to pop up.  It's really starting to get annoying.  However there are a few words that don't need to be said, ever.  There is no excuse for it.  There is no reason for it.  There is no justification for it.

Lately, it's been about Paula Deen and her words.  Apparently, Paula Deen recounted in a court case how she's used the N-word in the past.  As a result of her admission, she was vilified by the public and fired by Food Network.  This has caused an outpouring of support by Paula Deen supporters as well as applause by those who felt her words were unforgivable.

I'm pretty glad that Food Network did what they did.  I'm glad they took a stand against this kind of behavior.  I'll go into more detail on why I'm glad they did it, but it's not because of her use of the N-word.  I'm going to say this about the N-word.  It's a terrible, awful, horrendous, and evil word.  It tears people down.  It rips people apart.  It's a word that causes strife and brings to mind the terrible atrocities done to Black people since they were brought to America as slaves.  I know I wasn't there for slavery, the Civil Rights Movement, or segregation; however the remnants from those times before are very well prevalent.  I'm bothered that Ms. Deen used those words, however I'm even more bothered that people in general use that word.  Rap artists, kids on the streets, racists, and bigots all use that word as loosely as my jeans are since I did Insanity.

The use of that word is terrible.  I can pretty much guarantee you that if Ms. Deen used that word once, she's used it 1000 times.  How would I know?  I grew up in the South.  Anyone who can use that word once, can use it over and over again.  And not just Paula, but the rest of the people I listed have probably used that word easily.  So yeah, I'm going to go ahead and call it like I see it.  If Deen used that word like that, I'll venture to say that at the very least, she feels black people are slightly inferior to her.  I couldn't care less what the circumstances are.  I work with a young man with Autism.  He has done some things to me that hurt, a lot.  It sucked.  However, if I were to call him the R-word because he's hurt me, I'm no better than Ms. Deen.  Being hurt by someone is no justification for using any totally offensive words.

Now to why I think Ms. Deen was rightfully fired.  It really has more to do with her attitude about Black people.  The reason I believe her firing was justifiable was because of her plans for a family member's wedding.  She felt it would be a good idea to hire a bunch of African American wait staff and dress them as 19th Century slaves.  Please give me one way that that is a good idea.  For someone to have that kind of flippant attitude about a whole group of people is shameful.  That's why I'm glad Paula Deen was fired.  She doesn't think everyone is on equal ground.  She believes her group of people are better.  That's my issue.  Her treatment of an African American general manager at her restaurant is the reason her firing was good in my book.

I do think that Paula's actions are just a small problem.  There is a terrible epidemic of people thinking other people are beneath them.  There is a terrible problem of Black people treating other Black people wrongly.  The use of the N-word probably being the most evil of all.  How in the world can we expect other people to treat us with respect if we can't do it ourselves?  You know how we avoid saying bad words around our kids because we don't want them to repeat them?  Well, I think Black people should do the same.  Avoid using things that upset us so that other people don't do the same.

Paula Deen didn't make a mistake.  She chose to use that word.  Let's stop calling it a mistake.  Let's call it what it is, sin.  It's a sin to say horrible things about other people.  It's a sin to consider people lower on the totem pole than you.  It's a sin to consider people less than you.  Paula Deen's problem isn't a use of a word "once."  Paula Deen's problem is her believe that she is superior simply because she isn't Black.  Like I said, if she's said it once, she's said it too many times.  And from past experience, that once isn't all.